- Find more evidence for climate change and global warming to support my idea
- Write more about how I feel about the city not being able to be prepared.
The most challenging part about this assignment i think would be being able to type a 5 page essay without getting off topic and to fit in some parts of the article and the book The Global Warming Reader in the essay. I need to be able to get better at finding more evidence and to write more.
- Write more about how I feel about the city not being able to be prepared.
The most challenging part about this assignment i think would be being able to type a 5 page essay without getting off topic and to fit in some parts of the article and the book The Global Warming Reader in the essay. I need to be able to get better at finding more evidence and to write more.
Hello Ibraham,
ReplyDeleteMy name is Gemma and I am training to be a tutor in the writing center. I was asked to give some feedback on people’s blogs.
You give good detail in this essay and include some strong, shocking quotes! However, I do think that you could take it a little further by elaborating on some things. In the second paragraph, when you say that “our rising temperature leads to insufficient food and rise of water level”, I think it would be useful to include how or why this happens. What evidence did you read that can back up this quote?
I also like that you have summarized your quotes, but I think that their summaries could use a bit more detail. Your quote taken from page 76 is a complex one and could use further explanation. As an outside reader and knowing very little on global warming, It would be useful to me to have more information so I can better understand what these quotes mean.
This quote that you used on page 70 is really juicy. This is an important, scary fact and I think it is great that you chose to use it. It seems to work as a nice transition into your opinion on the article too. However, I think that it would be nice to hear a little more of what you think about this issue or what you have learned from the article.